The Course - Part I

Much like Roland of Gilead, the hero of The Dark Tower series of which I am currently enjoying Volume 5, I am far from home on a journey of discovery, incredible danger and amazing intrigue... My fellow traveller Kemp, somewhat like Roland's right hand man, Eddie Dean, is currently recovering from the first part of our journey. If it weren't for the inherent nature of this quest, I'd say he was being boring. But of course, as the quest leader, I must understand that my comrades need their rest, and as a seasoned traveller I may have slightly unfairly high expectations of young Kemp.

As I sit in my temporary accommodation, I reflect on the comforts of home and how masterfully I have adapted my present surroundings to match said comforts. It didn't take long to discover how the heating worked, or where they kept the hypoallergenic pillows, so now I can assume my position of power and preparation for the days ahead.

The next 3 days will be spent on an Advanced Life Improvement Course. This pseudonym has been created by me in order to protect Kemp and myself from certain positional discovery and therefore thwart any attempts at preventing us from completing our most important journey. Be assured that our lives are in danger, and I can not disclose the true purpose of our journey for fear of endangering ourselves, and indeed, you, my avid readers.

I will attempt to update you on the vast improvements that I will no doubt see within myself, and Kemp, over the coming days. Of course, I must warn you reader, depending on the toxicity and potency of this Course, I may emerge a wholly new person - someone capable of only talking in the language of the Improved, someone so Advanced that they are no longer permitted to coerce with beings such as yourselves, someone who will lead such an amazing Life full of Advanced Improvements that all sense of normality is overtaken and replaced by an overwhelming sense of enlightenment. In fact, I may just disappear into a haze of Omniscience.