Connectile Dysfunction

Ok, so I'm sat in the office of one of the largest media organisations in the world (my employer) and can't really do any work. Why? Because the email system is down - the entire company has no email. Apparently it won't be fixed until tomorrow. Brilliant. Thank the lord that this hasn't affected our internet connection.

I'm sat in the email-less office on my own. All phones are diverted to me, and I sit and wait for the phones to ring. Why? Because everybody else has gone to help out at some foodbank where they pack up tins of food for people who can't afford to eat. Why am I not with them? Because I don't agree with disturbing society's process of natural selection; namely, Amnesty International and all the other charities who aid the human race in their never ending plot to save the entire planet, disrupt the natural order of things, and eventually destroy the earth in it's entirety.

But I'm not completely alone. Originally I thought that I'd be able to divert my phone (and hence, the phones of everyone else) to my mobile and just go home. But no - my boss has decided to stay in the office too. So far he's annoyed me just with his presence, as it means I can't go home as planned. And also, he's made me realise that he has no clue what kind of an evil person I am. Or maybe he does now... He said to me 'so why aren't you out at the charity place; that seems like something that's right up your alley' - He clearly knows NOTHING about me. I'm the least charitable person in the world and would much rather see the whole race of humans, including myself, die a painful and explosive death than let the earth perish under the strain of the population, and would therefore never give anything; my time, my money or my attention, to a charity that's sole purpose is to extend the life of humans. Let them starve - that's what I say.

I don't expect anybody to agree with me, and I don't usually enforce my view onto others. (I remained fairly quiet about my intentions to stay in the office and offered no explanation to my colleagues who questioned my motives.) But I just figured that this is MY blog and I can talk about whatever I want to on here. So, if you don't like it, don't read it.